Yesterday I was reading my friend Greg's blog (www.gregshead.net) about how his baby girl loves being noticed, and the perhaps innate need we humans have to be paid attention to by others. I commented that I certainly could relate, to having the need to be noticed, listened to, in general, to be loved, and I certainly agreed that children, even as babies, revel in being noticed by others.
Then today I was watching TV, again the show where the main character, a grown woman with her own child, lives in her mother's house after her divorce. As I said in my previous post "My Mom" many of the most entertaining and moving scenes happen when the mother and daughter are together. Today's episode was no different. The mother was talking about the children she gets to see in her profession, abused, battered, emotionally wounded, and as she remembers the "crazy" things she used to do for her daughter when she was growing up, she realizes, these abused children don't have that. They don't have someone to do crazy things for them, out of love for them, she sums it up like this:
"Perhaps their greatest loss is not having someone who will abandon common sense and dignity on their behalf."
I think that is so true! Children need to be noticed, certainly. They also need someone whose love is so overwhelming they will sometimes temporarily abandon common sense and dignity on their behalf. Perhaps when society labels them "weird" for being home schooled, or when their faith clashes with the culture we live in, or when the child for some reason is just "different". They need someone who won't mind being thought a fool to stand up for them, to be strong for them, to abandon "common sense and dignity" if only temporarily.
I didn't have that. My parents were definitely willing to abandon common sense and dignity, not on my behalf, but rather on their own behalf, no matter what that meant for us, their children. HOW VERY SAD.
Yet today I have a Father who notices me, and who went to crazy lengths to stand up for me, so I want to live in that overwhelming love. And I want my son to have someone who will teach him about that love, and put aside their own gain and reputation for his sake.
Out of pure love for him.
And I want that someone to be me.
1 comment:
Hey Laura
This is related to what we were talking about at your house the other night... you guys have a great opportunity to give your kid(s????) what you did not have. You both can learn from your childhoods and start a fresh line of great, healthy families with Lakelan and any more kids who will have great, loving parents who will do anything for their kids.
Good on ya!
I think it's cool, too, how it's kinda like my parents. They both had some pretty crazy growing ups, but were able to create a loving family for my sister and me that was just a nice foundation for us to pass on to our kids. So, it can definitely be done.
Glad I get to continue the heritage for our kids, and I hope it continues for generations for them. Family is supposed to be a great thing, and I think we can make it that, just by loving each other completely, "willing to abandon common sense and dignity." :-)
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