Wednesday, August 18, 2004


Once in a while I need to remind myself of the truly important things.... Recently a dear friend's son's death brought much needed perspective into my life. Seems trite, but why is it that I always forget what is TRULY important? I am saved by grace and my sins have been atoned for by the blood of Jesus Christ, that means, I live forever in fellowship with God our Father...THAT's pretty important!!!!!!!!!! That should supercede anything else that comes my way, but sadly,relatively unimportant "stuff" seems to get ahead in line all the time, bills to pay, stressful job, lack of a job, lack of time, sadness, cats not using the litter box properly.. :) etc. As if forgivess of my sins and eternal life with God wasn't enough, there are SO many blessings in my life!!!!! A great husband who loves me and whom i love, 2 GREAT stepdaughters who love me and whom I love, an awesome new house, many many friends in Christ, i could go on and on....but I don't...somehow, on most days, I'm thinking more about the "other stuff". Well, no more!!! I think most people need to remind themselves to think of the AWESOME things in their life FIRST, before starting their day and cluttering it with temporary and relatively unimportant stuff....if anything, it ought to help us make decisions that impact the "unmovable" stuff positively, and I am sure it would also help with moodiness and crankiness, not that I struggle with that or anything ;-)

Monday, August 16, 2004

A baby?

I thought I'd want a baby...a baby of my own, a baby of "our" own :-) (I guess I should include my husband) I've always thought that I'd want to be a mom someday, I've always thought that God made me to be, among other things, a mom. I like kids...some kids I LOVE...but I like all kids. I can find something to identify with in most kids, which is helpful when you want to "hang out" with them. Mostly...I do not have a hard time remembering what it was like to BE a kid, and so I try to tap into that as much as possible, to make it easier on me and the kid/kids in question,but quite honestly, also for fun. yeah...FUN. If you can actually live out what you remember about being a kid, it's a LOT like you still ARE one!! and in hanging out with kids,'s VERY helpful :-)
So...I never quite questioned the whole "being a mom" thing....but obviously, I dont KNOW what it'd be like. But this morning, I had quite a glimpse. I offered to "hang out" with(I dont like the word "babysit")my friend's 6 months old son while I worked (I work on the phone from home).
And so I did, he was here with me, while I worked.... and I LOVED IT!
I WILL NOT say that it wasn't hard to was! was THE most multitasking I've ever done!! and for anyone who knows me, that's saying something!
Nor will I say that I remember what it was like to be a 6 months old,I dont... but somehow, we were ok. He seemed to enjoy my company and I certainly enjoyed his. Granted, he is a great baby, he's usually in a good mood, and when he's not he usually has a very good reason for it, which is more than I can say for myself.
I had a glimpse of what it'd be like to be at home working, and hanging out with MY baby, and OH MY! I liked that glimpse a lot! would probably be the hardest thing I've ever done, but....if it's this great with a good friend's child...I just CAN'T imagine how awesome it would be with my own....I dont think you're supposed to be able to. Imagine, that is....
I think God likes to bless us with surprises like that.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

life changes,its been a while since the last time I blogged....lots of new things, new address, new home!!!!
Since moving here to our first home, lots of different things have happened,but mostly, I have been thinking about how good God is.
I have never personally or through family "association" been a homeowner. That hit me as I sat here in my new livingroom, considering what it means to have a chance to make this house a home. What a huge blessing that is, and how it goes way beyond these walls. It means my husband and I have a chance at building a marriage, a family, a life that honors God. It means I don't have to be a part of a vicious cycle of dysfunction, abuse, pain, abandonment,but rather be a "cycle-breaker". What an honor. What a task! God first blessed me with Salvation, and now He is blessing me with a great opportunity to build a new life, become a better person, pleasing in His eyes. Sometimes I lose sight of that...I complain....we dont make enough money, the house needs remodeling, our cats litter box stinks ;-)... but then all I have to remember is where I've been, both physically and spiritually, and remember that I am the richest I have ever been!!
Praise God...."Let the weak say I am strong, let the poor say I am rich, let the blind say I can see, it's what the Lord has done in me" I was weak,poor and blind....Praise God I am not anymore!!!!