Surrender

Recently I had to (and still am) deal with some major unpleasant family stuff.
(by family I mean the one I grew up with,my immediate family).

I won't get into details, mostly because, they're unpleasant to say the least, but what I've come away with from it all so far is, surrendering to God, and his love, sometimes is really all you have left. Not that that isn't enough in and of itself, I just mean, sometimes you REALLY have no other options.

Most of us know about God's love for us, and we know He is really all we need, but we still do hang on to our relationships, our posessions, careers, whatever makes us feel good. Well, what I have recently been going through has left me in a place where all I can really do is cling to God, my Father, and his love.
Because the hurt, the pain, the holes left in my heart can only be healed and filled by him. The only one who knows the pain I feel is him.

In the face of such pain and powerlesness there's great comfort in knowing that at least HE KNOWS what I suffered and still suffer;he knows what I lacked as a child and what I need now. So all I need to do, is surrender. Surrender to the notion that what happened can't be changed, and surrender to the notion that what I needed as a child, I didn't get. But most importantly, surrender to the notion that the love I need now comes from my gracious heavenly Father.